8.00 AM
The whistle of the pressure cooker cried aloud. Susheela was sweeping the floor in the front room. Its only the first whistle, she thought. The phenol smell was punching her nose. Manoj sat there reading newspaper. Dressed in his company uniform this is his routine before the company bus comes to pick him up. He was a man in his early fifties. His face was showing his ageing process through some wrinkles here and there. Some grey hairs had already found its place among the others. When Asha and Anusha teased him of getting old he would quip that’s the premonition of something good that is going to happen. He then always used to narrate the anecdote of his grandmother stating that when luck is on your way, it is notified in the form of grey hairs on head. But he was not sure whether she had referred about any bald head like the one he is sporting.
The third whistle blew loudly and this time very fiercely. Leaving the sweeping mat in the floor itself Susheela ran towards the kitchen. Wiping her dirty hands in the Saree, she got the stove off. “Manu, I want an exhaust fan over here”, she said in a loud voice, “it’s very hot over here in kitchen. You won’t understand the difficulty.” There was no reply from the living hall. “Only we woman knows what it is like to be in a kitchen in a boiling temperature. You guys only need to move your ass from the comfortable sofa to the cushioned seat near the dining table. There will be everything on the table ready to be served.” She said to herself in a husky voice.
“Don’t worry better half. Did you read the horoscope for this week? It reads a great week coming for me. TAURUS: You will have a wonderful week. You will be rewarded both professionally and personally. Your long pending promotion will be awaiting you. New purchases for household are on cards. Monetary problems will be resolved and your love life will be exciting.” He passed a loud laughter after reading out his horoscope. It was for the week September 13 to September 20. “Lady, Its a rewarding week for me this time.”
Susheela came back to the living room. Not much impressed with his excitement she continued to sweep the tiled floor. “Now what do you mean by excited love life. Two grown up daughters, couple years before retirement, sloping down health; I think there are many more things to get excited.” The pace of sweeping increased gradually wiping of the whole dirt the precious day had left when gone.
Manoj got up from the sofa. He kept the newspaper folded on the glass teapoy and came near to Susheela. “Age is not a barrier for these things, wife”, he hushed in her ears. She blush a little. She always does when he calls her ‘wife’. “Oh shut up, kids are there in the other room. You don’t know when to get romantic and where.” She took the bucket and headed towards the bathroom. Aasha came out from her bedroom and gave a hug to her father. “Where is Anusha” he enquired. “She is in the bathroom having her hour long bathe.” Planting a kiss on his cheek she switched on the television.
“Susheela, I am leaving; surprises waiting for you in the evening.” He took his bag and left the flat. “This man will never change” Susheela thought. A small smile bloomed on her face A coy smile.
6.30 PM
Hours later she was surfing the television. Jumping from channel to channel ‘Aaj Tak’ caught her attention. Breaking News. She stopped by. For Aaj Tak and India TV there will be something breaking news all the time, she thought. Reading the news she got enraged. ‘What will be this nation’s state if such devils try to break the peace now and then’ she thought. The count was increasing showing the monstrous face of the blasts that rocked in five spots in the city.
She took the mobile to give Manoj a call. That is when she realized why didn’t he call after the blasts? Maybe he might not be aware of it, she thought. She dialled the number. The whole network was jammed. She went near to the landline and dialled her husband. Ring went but, no one responded. He will be in bus and the mobile in vibrating mode, she thought. “This happens most of the times. I don’t understand why he need to keep in vibrating mode”, she said to herself. She redialled the number. Did he go to buy the exhaust fan? Did he plan some surprises buying goodies this week? Her thoughts started going wild. Her face started to reflect the panic which was growing in her mind. She dialled the number again and again.
Nobody answered the call, ever.
73 comments:
omg omg, I was reading and I thought, oh that s gonna be a nice story, I like it, and for some reason just before the 6.30PM I thought something bad will happen, dunno y. My god the end is so sad
'Nobody answered the call, ever.'
brrr
Great great story but I wish it will never ever happen to me!
Cheers
C.
Gosh! Blasts and terrorist acts are deplorable.
u shocked me dis tym!a lovely fairytale to a tragic end!i'm carried away by d description..kudos..
nicely scripted ....
this is precisely what the near and dear ones of the terror victims would go through ... frantically trying to hear their voice ... and optimistically thinking of hundred excuses ...
you have captured it really well ...
This leaves me depressed! I'm signing out and going off tu sleep :(
Nice, sad story :(
Oh no! :(
Well narrated buddy!
@cess,
and i wish this happens to no one..!!
:)
@kiran madam
exactly...condemnable..!!
:)
@anwesa,
this rocked the entire nation,my friend..!!
thanks for those comments..
:)
@hiren,
thanks friend..the pain of theirs can never be traced the way they feel..i just tried a bit..!!thts all..
:)
@priya
i am confused whether to take your comment as an appreciation or criticism..
i didnt intend to push you to depression.. :)
@sameera,
thanks..its indeed sad ending, i know..!!
:)
Thanks for stopping by my blog. And please stop addressing me as Madam. Kiran is fine.
Lesson - horoscopes are big time liars!
hey u narrate like Saki the end part is too good whether its happy or sad like this its a kindaa mystery a null situation.
I dun ever wanna experience that!
well-written Vinu. It just depicts the REALITY of life and circumstances.
Keshi.
hey do attend the poll on ma blog
Awesome one dude. Hope the nation's horoscope does'nt read "Good things coming your way".
LOL....
In my coll days... even we used to look for lines soemthing like that "romance is in air"... but never ever cud find that "air"...:PPP
dude thats nice wrte up...u have done a gr8 job in the narration ..:)..but the end as it was tragic..:(..
urs..hemu..
dude why????????????
it was buildin up so nicely n like a japanese novelist u gave it a tragic endin :(((((
brilliantly written again...jus smthn in ur words n d whole scene u create is magical...
d last line was like i was shot
Might truly be someone's story! Well-narrated.
@kiran,
u r welcome..sure..was a bit uncomfortable calling you by name..!!
:)
@divya
BIG time..!!!
:)
@priya joyce,
thank you...yeah it was a sad end, one i was not comfortable with..but it turned out to be like that..!!
:)
@keshi,
nobody wants infact..!!
thank you for your comments..very true..its so unpredictable..!! and that too in the society we live in..
:)
@priya joyce,
sure..will do..
@vinod,
welcome dude..long time..!!
thanks man for the comments..
yeah, sarcastically..!!
:)
@chakoli,
:).. its all over there.. just that we keep on complaining about the pollution..!!
:)
@hemu,
thanks friend..those words are encouraging..!!
yeah the end was tragic..well, life is a package..!!
:)
@mayz,
even i didnt want it to end like that..sad endings are painful as always..!! but just it turned out to be like that.. infact the pain was first conceived and then the first part was added to it..
and magical words.. who is telling whom..?
:)
@sol
maybe...
thanks..!!
:)
damn damn damn.. why didja kill him?> it was a sweet romantic story man... did ram gopal verma drink alcohol with you?...
nicely narrated.. never expected the end... gud work bro
I wasn't expecting this. Quite an anti-climax.
Nice narrative there. I guess I have told you already that u can be a good short story teller. Are you planning to continue this one.. It ended perfectly but I feel you should continue it.
touching , moving, engenders feelings of disgust, frustration, helplessness .. sorrow .. even imagining the pain itself is unbearable ...
anyway treating it as an article ... you painted a picture .... u havent written a story here .. u have painted one .. :)
@chriz,
i know that was a sadistic end...but it just turned out so...without that punch of a drink..!!
thanks for the appreciation..!!
@ D
yeah, that was quite depressing..!! but life is like that..!!
@oxy,
ur words are indeed encouraging...but i doubt i fit into it..i feel this is just a developing phase..!! continuation of this story will lead to a tragic life by the female character..but still i think we can bring some other twists..
but again, i dont prefer sequels..!!
@sidharth,
thats a great compliment i guess..if i could paint a picture in my readers mind with these words scripted, what more to ask for..
thanks for dropping by..!!
hmm it hurts.
u kno what i liked abou last para is how she never thought he could be hurt in the blasts. that's how all of us do. even the first commenter said the same ... i hope it never happens to me. it's human nature ... and u portrayed that well.
Good story.. am adding you to my blogroll so i may read more at leisure (in office thtis)
brilliant mate...
Sad story but I know astrologer/s who are manipulators with the words and players of human emotions
Very sad story...
Beware of cheaters
:))))
human nature u see:PP
ohh !!
there was a punch in the last line !!!!
very well written ..sounds so real!
The story left me speechless....
Sad but such a true story...am short of words...
gosh that was sad.. :(
very good story.. and comes at an apt time too..
:(
:(
Nicely narrated....hope if it did happen to anyone for real they are able to come to terms with it....
This is so not happening !!
I mean I loved your narration n story-telling and the way you handled the plot...just that I'm a scker for happy endings !
:(
OMG!!!
i was convinced it was goin' 2 hav a nyc endin'...u rock,dude...u rly got me spell-bound...
@roop,
yeah it hurts..
exactly..i am happy you saw my effort...actually i wanted to portray that whenever some terror is happening we never imagaine it can affect our relatives too..!!
@avdi,
welcome to this space..!!
:)
@vicky,
thnx man..
:)
@hobo,
very true...lots of manipulators...and here i was portraying the stuff that comes on newspapers...!!
:)
@sachin,
welcome to this space..
:)
@chakoli,
oh yeah..:)
@peter,
thnx man..great you liked it..!!
yeah i will be joing..!!
:)
@smita,
welcome to this space..
thnx for your comments..!
:)
@divya,
yeah, that was sad ending actually...
thanx, you liked it..
:)
@gunj,
:(
:)
@ceedy,
thanks ceedy...no..it was pure fiction...but definitely there will be such stories happened in delhi, ahmedabad and jaipur..!!
:)
@cinderella,
me too..i hate sad endings..!! but this turned out to be like that..!!
:)
@pooja,
thank you pooja...great to know the story was good even though it ended with a sad note..!!
:)
..You are good man..sad story...but with true, harsh and hitting undertones.. :)
rolling you..
@zubin,
thnk you zubin..welcome to this blog..!!
u rock.. nobody cud have given it a much explanatory look.. saw "a wednesday" today.. wished every one including me played a role similar to nasarudheen shah in real life!!
@sawan,
thanks friend...
even i saw wednesday...a good movie..
:)
Well written but why such a sad ending :(
Good words.
Great efforts. I really appreciate your collections. No doubt that mehndi is the best trend in the newspaperspk. I like mehndi and mehndi songs a lot. Latest Mehndi.
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