Tuesday, June 28


I looked out through the window. It was not raining though cloudy. It was heavy raining since morning. This is the best time to leave office, I thought. Packed my bag and came out of my cabin.

“So early”, Archana asked. She knows mostly I leave by eight or nine. I checked the clock. Its only ten minutes past five. Passed a bye in a hurry and headed towards the parking lot. Got the bike and left company office campus in a jiffy.

Fifty meters. It started drizzling. I started cursing my fate. Always it happens. Till I leave for somewhere it will be perfectly fine climate. But as soon as I leave it will rain. Today also it had to happen with me. But good gracious, I love rains. I love to get wet in rains.

It’s always a fun to get wet. In Kerala start of monsoon is with school re-opening. We used to play cricket in the grounds even if it was drizzling. Chasing for a ball in the muddy field is a never-explainable enjoyment. By the time we reach home we will be sneezing. But never we used stop playing cricket in rains.

I was looking both sides of the road. Just to find how others were enjoying rains.

I saw a man running down under a tree in order to cover himself from rains, but failed from saving himself get wet. Then there was a kid in school uniform. His shirt and trousers were already wet. His hair were wet and ruffled. He was trying to hide bag from getting wet. A group of schoolgirls were standing aloof, not knowing what to do.

When I reached the junction I saw the flower-selling lady trying to cover her cart with a plastic cover, cursing the rain. A bike suddenly overtook me. There were three guys shouting, but very visible they were very happy to drive in rains. While an old man was showering swears on them for splashing water on him. A beggar lady was trying to take shelter under a parked truck.

There is a huge crowd assembled in front of a leading bank’s ATM. They all were taking shelter from the rain. Most of them had raincoats, but still were not willing to ride in rains. Some females already wet trying to set their cloths properly. Still the street is very crowded. Some two-wheeler riders were rushing towards their target when some were having a smooth ride embracing the drizzle drops and enjoying the chill of rain. Four-wheelers seemed to be not affected with this climate. But some were driving very carelessly splashing all the mud rainwater on pedestrians and bikers.

I enjoyed all the scenes involved with rains. I enjoyed everyone’s reactions towards rain. I raced my bike. Raindrops were falling on me and the feeling of pin pricking on face is something that I love most in monsoon season. And my cloths were getting wet; I could feel raindrops percolating my dress.

Who the hell sang?

Rain rain go away…
Come again another day..
Little johny wants to play…

It should have been

Rain rain come again..
little vinu wants to play…
la la la….

Monday, June 27

What a disgrace!!

I wonder how such an incident could have happened in a place nearby to Lucknow, a much-developed town. I wonder, in India, so called secular-democratic country, such systems still prevails.

She is mother of five and un-educated. Her own father-in-law at their home allegedly raped Imrana, wife of Noor Ilahi earlier this month. Leading newspapers had reported this heinous crime occurred. I think rape is the worst crime against a woman, which can destroy her individuality like anything. Though the thought of that incident is boiling, the proceedings after that leaves me numb.

Panchayat held at Charthawal village in Muzaffarnagar district near Lucknow ruled that she would have to live with her father-in-law as his ‘wife’ and her current husband should treat her as his ‘momma’. Courageous after this incident also, Imrana resisted the panchayat’s decision. Her husband, coming out from an exile due to fear of father and panchayat after three weeks, had supported her decision to go against Panchayat. That time, around three days back, they had showed their full confidence on judiciary system.

But today reports came that Darul-Uloom Deoband, their local apex body had rules out that Imrana is no longer fit to remain as wife of Noor. The fatwa {ruling order} issued by them clearly states that, even though the father-in-law is the culprit, since she was raped Imrana is ‘haraam’ for her innocent husband. They state that she should treat Noor as her son, but Noor should bear all the expense of their five children.

Noor, who was supporting his wife {now onwards used-to-be wife} had said he wanted to stay with his wife only but will definitely abide fatwa rules.

So disgusting his stand is. Being a man, had promised to take care of her while marrying her, taking such a stand is ridiculous. I pity on that female for having such an unfortunate fate. She is willing to protest against all the injustice happening to her. How one can expect to lead a life with the person who had raped her, who never has a respect for her.

I wonder where are those human rights activists, those NGO’s who run after silly matters.
No wonder, people have lost faith in our judiciary system. And no wonder more and more females are loosing their confidence on their counterparts.

Sunday, June 26

Ban on mobiles......Reminds me...

Kerala Government had ordered an ordinance to ban usage of mobile phones in Campus, reports Hindu.
The latest trendsetter, mobile camera phone, is always in limelight since its launch. Be it new model launch or be it MMS scandals. It became common household equipment in cities throughout.

The ban of mobile phones in campus reminded me one of the incidents that happened in my college. Let me tell you this is a second hand report.

All the students were getting bored with his lecture. Not only that day. His each and every lecture never ignited that urge to learn that subject. As a professor he was a total failure, but was able to stick to his post just because of some high management holds he had over they’re in college. That might be the reason; even students feared he could do a lot with their internal marks if not attend his lectures.

So all were busy checking their dials and waiting for him to disperse the class. But he was not in mood to free the birds. Dictating from the notes he had brought in a file format he was continuing his ‘lecture.’

Suddenly somebody’s mobile rang. It was a Hindi song ring tone. Everyone’s attention went to the corner of the class and smiled at the owner of the source. He was busy fiddling with the instrument trying to reduce the volume. {Later only came to know that one of his friend only kept it in high volume profile and gave him a ring.} Seeing his embarrassment all other fellows broke their laugh’s.

"Silence", Prof. took his eyes from his notes and peeped through his spectacles. Everyone turned on to silent mode and the professor towards the board with file in his hand. {We always used to wonder how would have he taught us if we had abandoned those files.} Students again got relieved and started hissings.

It was not even five minutes after the incident, some other person’s mobile buzzed aloud. This time he could control in a second or two, but the crowd went ablaze with laughter. Cursing the caller, the guy changed the profile to vibratory mode. The Prof. though disturbed continued his drawings on board, copying from his file. In a minute a third mobile started screaming. Everyone broke into a louder laughter. This time Sir got frustrated. He turned around and stared at the culprit.

"Is this the decency you have learnt from home. {A gap. Students stopped laughing.} Don’t you know that you are supposed to switch off the mobiles while entering a class? Don’t remember that you are going to be engineers and lots of good manners are expected from you people. {Everyone started looking down. Some were still in playing mood.} You are not going to gain anything by disturbing me in my procedure to teach you. {Everyone looked each other startled as if not understanding what he was saying.} Don’t repeat this anymore. If continued I have to take strict action against you. Whoever it might be. So please switch off your instruments." He was shouting at the pinnacle of his voice.

Everyone switched off his or her instruments. Some were asking quietly, "which instrument", with a naughty smile on their face. The situation was very silent. Prof. once again covered the whole class with his deadly stare {which was supposed to generate fear} and turned towards the black board and started scribbling some notes.

Students were impatiently waiting for the hourly bell to ring, looking intermittently their dials. Prof. busy is copying his notes on board. All of a sudden some mobile rang in high volume. Annoyed, Prof. turned back, "who the hell haven’t switched off the mobile? I am going to report this." He was very furious.

All students chorused, "Sir SWITCH OFF YOUR CELL. IT’S ON YOUR TABLE." Class turned out to laugh more lauder. This time they couldn’t control their laughter. Some were humming to the ring tone.

By the mean time Prof. picked up the phone and was trying to hide his embarrassment.


Saturday, June 25

A Conversation with..........

Just woke up and sat in my bed. I was feeling very light-weighted. I felt like someone lifting me. I looked down. Yes indeed, am flying. My body was down there on my bed. Sound asleep. I looked up. Stars were twinkling at me. Clouds passed. I could feel them. Then came a bright hole. I was thrown into it.

Suddenly I came to a big hall with no floor. All the four walls were decorated with flowers. I could hear birds chirping.

In a minute an image came. I was trying to look at his face. But cant see anything. In fact it was leading to infinity. Only I could see is a broad smile. He had worn a red color robe, my favorite one. He or she? I couldn’t recognize. An image. That’s what I found in front me.

“Where am I?” I asked. It seemed to me as heaven.

“You have come to a hall from where GOD decides where you to go. Heaven or hell.” The image answered calmly.

“I don’t believe in GOD.” I said arrogantly.

“Then in what you believe.” it sounded very calm and undisturbed.

“I believe only in a mighty power which is the creator of everything. It doesn’t have any name or identity.” I answered back.

“Am I dead” I didn’t want to. I was anxious.

“No, not yet. Your time haven’t come” He {or she or it?} came nearer to me. Still I couldn’t see anything but only an image. Maybe this will be the almighty power in which I believe.

“Then why am here?” I couldn’t resist my doubt come out.

“I know you are suffering from many problems. I wanted you to share it with me”

“But you are the almighty power which is supposed to know everything before me saying.” I think I was in a fighting mood. No surprise. For the past two months I have been like this.

“I know it. But I want you to share with me. Sharing is the only way to vent out your feelings. If sorrow it reduces and if joy it doubles.” Same old philosophies! “I know all these. Please don’t preach. It’s very easy to preach. Even I try to do that with others. But to implement it is very hard. I came to know when I faced those situations. Huh! Sharing divides the sorrow…all crap...” I was getting furious.
“What is your problem? You got such a nice family. You have a wide range of friends. Lots of intimate friends who love you more than you do.” He touched my face. He or she? I will call ‘HE’. His fingers gently covered my cheeks. I love that feeling. Maybe he knows it. It gives a feeling of being cared. Or can say a feeling of getting protection.

I couldn’t see how his hands looked like. But yeah, it was there on my cheeks. I was able to feel it.

“I can understand your feelings. You feel no one understands your thoughts. When you share also you never feel anyone understands. Am I right?” He was absolutely right. He knows everything about me. Then why need all this drama? Why should I speak out? Why can’t he give ready answers for my sufferings?

“I want you to share it with me. I never give solution. But few options to choose from. Its you who have to choose from them.” He said as if he read my mind.

“I have lots of problems in my life. Related to my education, my future, my family, my friends, what to say nowadays in whatever I think. I am not able to give the love others are giving me. No one understands me. Neither I am happy nor are they. I sometimes feel like worthless.”

“You are the one who created the universe, who created emotions, who created senses, who created everything. Why all these imbalances in life? Why some people suffer while others enjoy. Wherever I look, I look injustice. People suffering without doing any harm, some others still going smooth with their life even if they goes against emotions and good deeds.” I was not in a mood to stop. I felt like asking him everything and make him justify.

“Child, I will show you something” Still he was so calm.

I didn’t look up. I know he will start preaching. I hate preaching. And I hate someone calling me child. It gives a feeling of lack of maturity.

“We have to balance our lives and do our deeds. That’s why I have sent you to earth so that you complete your tasks and come back to me in one lifetime. For everything I have to create a balance. That is a mystic rule I have to follow. That’s why I had to create hatred, ego, jealousy, enmity and all with love, care, friendship and all. But these all are options. It’s all up to you to choose from them. Those who do the right choice, suffer no more. Their life is enlightened and will be back with me. Happy forever. But those who do the wrong deeds are never called back. They might be happy over there. But after their lifetime they are again send back for their misdeeds to complete there pending life tasks. To complete your karma”

“All these things I know. This is what I believe in. This is what makes me go. But at times I get frustrated. Seeing things happening in my life I get a feeling that whatever I believe in is wrong. I can’t see my friends or family suffering. I can’t see myself suffering.” I was tired. My voice was low.

“I will show you something. I feel you are ready.” He again asked. I looked at him.

He touched my hand. My eyes were drooping. I went to some other place. The atmosphere was filled with smell of blood. I could see a father killing his daughter, a mother being raped in front of her children, a kid working in minefield, people starving, being robbed, heated fights, people cheating their closed ones, lots of trickeries and what all. I closed my eyes. I was sweating. “Get out me from here”, I was shouting. In a moment I was back to that decorated hall.

“Child, this is what I am seeing daily. A thousand times magnified version. I should get more frustrated than you. But I know whoever does all these are going to stay there only, till they get their share of punishment and repent for what they had done. Its how nature balances things.”

“But how do you stay calm seeing all these”, I was startled. My blood was still boiling seeing all those crimes. “I will show you”, his gentle words somewhat relieved me. He again touched my hand. In a flash I went to another world.

I could see a mother breast-feeding her kid. How calmly that kid was lying on her lap with her hand support. I saw a father writing letter to a distant daughter who went for studies, saw a sister trying to tease her brother, their fight and then share of hugs and kisses, saw a pair of couple holding each others hands and being within themselves, saw a grandmother teaching her grandchildren to cook, a boy happy reporting to his parents about the award he won, a gentleman getting down from his luxurious car and offering help to an orphanage, a lady helping an elder person to cross the road amidst a heavy traffic, thousands of smiling faces and what all. I wished I could run to them and join them in their happiness.

“How are you feeling?” I looked around. I am back to that hall. In front of me was the same image. I looked at him. “I see a thousand times magnified version of these every second. Are you still wondering how I am not frustrated?” I was numb in front of him.

“But I can’t see all these. Then how can I remain not getting frustrated? I don’t have your super abilities to watch all these. No one understands me or no one loves me the way I want.”

He smiled. He offered me one more trip. This time I moved my hand in front in a position that he could hold my hands. He again smiled and touched my hands. I was taken to another world. I was surprised. It’s my world. I could see my parents sleeping. I could see them dreaming about me. I saw my siblings. They were talking to their friends about me. I saw my colleagues who were confiding to their dear ones about the beautiful relationship they are having with me, I saw my friends enjoying my company. Then I saw my friends with whom I fought yesterday night not being able to sleep well, getting up intermittently and thinking about me. My eyes were wet. I hate to cry. Men never cry. But my eyes were wet. I closed my eyes. I don’t want anyone to see my tears rolling down. I shut my eyes tightly. He was whispering on my ears, “Child, there are lots of people who loves you, who wants you to be happy, who wants you to make them happy. Who shed tears for you without your knowing, who have sleepless nights without your knowing, who pray for your well being without your knowledge, who wants to place a kiss on your cheeks, who wants to hug you and show their love. There are much more than sufferings in your life. Get back to them. Don’t think about those who had hurt you. There are people who love you more than you do them. Don’t cry for lost relationships. But be happy, you got a bunch of dear ones whose love, if showered all together, you cant handle.”

It was silent. No more voice came. I opened my eyes. I was lying down in my bed. I got up and sat on my chair. I saw a dream. No. It was not a dream. I didn’t want to believe it was a dream. All those images were still running in my mind. All those who love me were smiling at me in my mind. I laughed at myself for yesterdays fight with my friend and felt bad that I have hurt them. Sorry friends. Sorry my family. I realize I am one among the luckiest one to get you all. And I promise I will do care not to hurt anyone.
Thinking of everyone I loved I went to sleep again. With a joyous mind and soul.

Friday, June 24


It was touching. Indeed alarming.

I had read about him on newspaper when Chinese Prime had a visit in India. That day he had a demonstration of protest against Chinese delegates visiting India and was shouting slogans for Tibetan Independence.

Young, educated in India, labeled as refugee, Tibetan poet-activist Tenzin Tsundue he is. The article which he wrote recently winning the Outlook/Picador award points out the agony and helplessness faced by ten thousands of Tibetan refugees who had fled from their mother country{I doubt whether I can call it a country},escaping from Chinese tortures.

Tenzin, who was born in India, whose parents had a bad trek along Himalayas, had never being to his motherland. In his writing we can see the pain inflicted in him right from his childhood when we read

Perhaps the first thing I learned at school was that we were refugees and we didn't belong to this country.

When he narrates the helplessness of some Tibetan youths, I wonder whom to curse. Their fate to be born in an oppressed country or the mighty power of not-to-be-questioned China. The tears that rolled down finding the absence of his country in Olympics, realizing its non-existence in the world political map was carrying all the heat of Tibetan peoples who were butchered by the Chinese government.
What can I, a refugee, talk about except the wish to go back home?
When the author puts a question, we all are numb. There we can visualize something, which, not even our freedom fighters had experienced.

They only dream about a free Tibet. It can be clearly seen when he says about the decision not to fix a full proof roof or to plant short term vegetations. They are always in the hopes of returning to their motherland and once again enjoy the beauty of their valleys and cattles. But towards the end author fears his hopes to remain as hopes only. In a near distant he cant see a re-union of his family.

A well-crafted article, which really makes us aware of a dreaded situation that, prevails in our neighborhood. I feel ashamed of not being of aware about this. But now I do join them. If ever I meet a Tibetan refugee, I will try to give him support for his never-dying hopes, a free Tibet.

Wednesday, June 22


Boring hours in office makes me think lots of things. And after a hectic day it is almost Impossible for me to get into some other activity other than sleeping. But yes there is one thing I love most. One matter, in which I won’t say no to. Some activity, in which I am ever ready whenever and wherever. It’s my foremost passion engrossed within me. Driving!!

It’s my passion. Ever since I learnt driving in my uncle's car when I was around fourteen it had been my passion. It doesn’t matter to me which car. I just need a conditioned car with four tires, an engine, a steering and a body. That’s more than enough for me. Yeah, some fuel to spare.

Whenever I get a chance to drive, I don’t let it go. Be it for a short distance or a long route. Be it in the wee hours of morning or late night. Be it a maruti 800 or a Tata Safari.

I can say driving actually is a skill. I don’t think most of the people will be enjoying. Many learn and continue driving just for the sake of driving. Or just for the sake of transport. But for me apart from these needs, it’s something, which relieves me from my tensions. Which brings hell lot of refreshment for both mind and soul.

Driving, rather than a skill is an art. It’s simply like a painter canvassing his thoughts or imaginations. Without good judgment and a strong vision he cant portrait what he wants to. Like that a driver can’t drive a vehicle without proper judgment and calculation.
It’s one of the simplest things in this world we can learn provided we understand certain basic things. One of them is the understanding of the gear-brake system. Once a person understands this mechanism {not a by heart of the procedure} its so simple for him/her to drive. And the second one is judgment of the size of the vehicle. Once vehicle size is carved in mind, I think there is nothing primarily needed to have a safe run.

For the past six years I had been driving so much that I have a great exposure to the driving attitude of others also. According to me majority of the accidents comes just because of the mistake people are making judging their vehicle and the speed of others. For a sharp judgment we have to very cautious while driving. If you are cautious and judgmental, I can assure how much fast you drive or rash you drive, it’s going to be safe drive.

But definitely these are to be acquired only by constant practice and interests. Thanks to my uncle who gave me the courage to think and drive properly. Last month I had a very long drive. Starting from Pune way back to Kochin, a distance of 1400 kilometers in a stretch and return. The best drive I had till date after my drive to Goa.

Driving through expressways and traffic free highways are not interesting. But if in a heavy traffic, two-way road, its fun. I can say driving in Kerala roads; especially Kannur-Kozhikode area is the best I had experienced. So congested roads, heavy traffic and high-speed vehicles in the opposite direction. For those who love driving, I recommend, once in their driving career, try these roads.

Anyways I think its time for me for a drive. Rest regarding drive, later…..

Monday, June 20

Tiger Caged

I don’t have any personal grudge towards Nawab Da Pataudi. But definitely I was very happy to read about his remand in all the lead newspapers.


By now Pataudi had spent two full nights in a special cell, not with much luxuries except a cot, a pair of table and chair and few bottles of mineral water. He is jailed in a cell like any other offender, but in a clean one. He had to get up early in the mornings than usual due to temperature and mosquitoes, contrary to a sound air conditioned sleep in his bungalow in the capital.

This definitely increases one’s belief and trust in police. The ex-cricketer has all the filthy contacts and rich by which he tried to avoid an arrest for the past two weeks. But Police had acted well to bring this ‘hunter’ into custody and had proven their capability and determination.

Now lets hope the trial begins and if found guilty the culprits get their share of punishment. But still I have a tincture of doubt in me. Same had happened with his son Saif and his mate Salman. Both of them also had been booked under ‘Black buck shoot’
Case. And the trial is still going on, around five years after their arrest also. Lets keep our finger’s crossed and look forward to.

Saturday, June 18

Ticket Less...!!!

We are way back to our own places.

Naveen also joined us. His father dropped us till railway station. It was real fun. One full week of roaming around the capital, sight seeing, beaches and babes, restaurants, driving {I just love it}, forts, museums and what else? The first day we reached here was quite boring. Had to be. This trip was planned in a jiffy. Sree had come to my place last week. After two days day’s we were getting bugged up and it was my uncle who put up this idea of visiting Trivandrum. Since we had nothing other to do we just packed in a hurry and headed to this city. We were staying at Naveen’s place.

“What if we don’t take tickets?” I asked.

Sree and Naveen looked at me, unbelievingly. We were discussing it while we were in the car way to station. After sending his father back we decided not to cheat railways. It was me who opposed to the idea first. Maybe I don’t dare that much. But don’t know why, now suddenly I felt I should dare. After I said that, three of us didn’t wait in the queue for tickets. Train had already arrived in the platform. We boarded in the middle one, with the hopes that in case Ticket Checker comes also he wont reach our compartment.

What prompted us to take this decision? When we came here we had taken the ticket and no one checked us. We had discussed about if we hadn’t taken the tickets that time. So why not dare this time? It sums around 250 for three of us. So if we can save that we can have another blast. And the time is 5 O’ Clock only. We will reach our destination by 9.00, soon before some TC comes in. If everything went well and fine, its time for a blast for us. We were so excited to start our journey, can say of adventure.

I was having some worries till the train started. But once the train set off on rails we forgot that we are having no tickets. The train had become crowded. The train started in a good pace and is passing through amazingly greenery areas. And we were running through various topics on what we did throughout the week. The swim in Kovalam Beach, the Masala Dosa from Indian Coffee House, Bikini clad foreigners basking in the sun, old forts we visited and their architecture, culture prevailed in the city, so on so forth.

A loud noise made us stop our talks. Naveen stood up and looked from where it was.
“We are dead, it’s the TC” Naveen screeched. Those words went like a thunder through our minds. I was at jolt. I felt as if world is going upside down. I closed my eyes. My thoughts got blocked.

“What to do?” Sree’s voice was breaking. I looked up. He was looking at me helplessly. There was no trace of confidence he had a minute ago. By the time Naveen had gone to the bedlam corner of the compartment. I didn’t know what to do? I looked outside. There are five more stations to reach our destination. “We are dead” Naveen came back and repeated and gave a drooled look. The TC caught someone who was traveling ticket less and was having a brawl. Till the moment the climate was chilled, but I feel a sudden rise of temperature. I looked up. He is reaching us.

“We will get down at next stop, wherever it is. Then catch next train or go by bus.” I couldn’t think of any other option but this. Both of them nodded their head. Naveen already folded his hands and closed his eyes. Must be praying. Should I? No! Why should I do something I don’t believe in? That too, during my hard times.

“What if he comes before the train stops and hold us?” I hate such questions. What if? Why we think of such a situation. Face it as it comes, whatever it might be. That’s what I believe in. That’s how I had come till here in my life. Never ever I felt I was wrong. Minutes passed like years. And felt as if the train is crawling. My heart began pumping like a horse set on a race. My face blanched. There is no sign of reaching any station. Yes, Naveen said it right. ‘We are dead.’ I closed my eyes.

“Tickets” Somebody patted on my back. Opened my eyes. Who else it would be?
I gave a bare stare. And he smiled. He was not even looking at me.

“Rupees. 150” He took a booklet from his old-black-worn-out-leather bag. He turned to others for tickets. Seeing their faces his lips tore apart with smile.
“Paisa illande lokam kaanan irangiyirikkya makkalu{Are you children traveling without having a single penny}” He spoke in a Trichur Malayalam tone. A.A.Nambeesan. His nameplate spelt. “Nootti anpathu, thala onninu{Pay 150 each}”.

“Sir, we lost our money way back in Trivandrum” Sree uttered. I looked at him amazed. We had almost thousand bucks remaining with us.

“Yes sir, I lost my wallet during our swim in the beach.” It took some time to say that only after reminding all of the money is inside the bag, which is kept under our adjacent seat. I opened my wallet to show only thirty rupees in it. “No, No. You have to pay at any cost. Or we will get down at next station and meet railway police.” He growled. I felt a thousand volcanoes erupting inside me. Why the bloody hell did I decide to dare. Wanted to feel pride of traveling ticket less and not being caught. Who the hell thought things will be like this. Now one thing is for sure. Either we have to pay fine or go to railway police. Either of them its embarrassing.

Many people started peeping inside. I saw everyone’s face. Some were enjoying the scenes, some pitying us and some staring at us not knowing what’s happening. Sree is pleading to pardon us and swearing won’t repeat it again. Naveen, dumbstruck is silently witnessing all.

“Children, what exactly had happened?” I looked beside for the source of that voice. A white robbed, bearded person was sitting beside me. I didn’t notice him even once during the 2-hour journey. His gentle smile put me at ease for a moment. His look prompted me to speak up the truth. But since already had made a false statement it will self branding ourselves as liars in front of these people. But somehow I felt this guy could help us out from this tussle.

“We went to Trivandrum for our holidays and while our swim and plays in the beach I lost my wallet which contained almost thousand rupees of ours. Since there was no one back at home we couldn’t arrange for money from anyone which left us only one option to cut short our trip and board a train without tickets. That’s why we caught the very first train where we thought no TC will be there and we will be safe back home.” In a single stretch I vomited. Sree and Naveen are totally supporting me with their facial expressions and gestures. Together we are making a good team, I thought.

I overheard some saying, “poor chaps, what else can they do?”

“I don’t wish to create a fracas over here” TC showed his impatience. “Pay 200, I will let you free from railway police.” We looked at him.” Sir, pardon us and please let us go. Just think if your children is having this situation.” Sree is good at emotional blackmails. But there is no trace of sympathy on his face.

“How much is it?” The same gentle voice asked. And before the TC said something, to everyone’s dismay he got 200 from his wallet and paid the bill. “Them or you, I only need the fine to be paid” giving the priest the token of bill he moved ahead, “Tickets, tickets.”

We three got shocked. So the others who are witnessing. I hold his hands in a way to thank. “Its ok dear. Its God’s decision that I made a sudden plan to board this train and believe I was destined to help you three out from this.” We were word-stuck. What to say? A person is helping us even though we are at fault and that too without knowing the fact. It is total silence in the compartment. I was filling with guilt. Should I say the truth? Only to him! How? The train is crowded and no privacy is there. Everyone is staring at us showing empathy.

For five minutes no one spoke. I looked at Sree. Took my wallet and found 40 rupees in it. Sree nodded. I think he understood what I was up to. I took the money and gave it to the priest. That’s what we told in public, “we have only few currencies.” He didn’t accept it. He smiled at me. “Child, don’t evaluate a generous help.”

“No father, Its just what we have. And we don’t have to feel guilty. That’s why.”
I tried but in vein. After ten minutes I enquired about his church keeping in mind that next day I can return the money at his church. But he read my mind. “No child. Just don’t try all these things. Be at ease and go to your home”

Ten minutes. Train reached our destination. We got up. Looked at the priest. He smiled. We said good-bye to him and all who sympathized us and then stepped out. Through the window he was saying to us “If you really want me to pay back do some generous act with that money for the poor. It will reach me.” In a minute the train left.

We walked down the platform. It was very crowded. We could see another train coming towards the platform. We three looked at each other. A small smile blossomed on our face. I understood we were thinking the same thing. We came out of the station. We are approaching the bus stop. A bus is coming fast towards us. Out of blue we all three chorused, “Once more!!!”

Friday, June 17

Nice One...

I just came accross the following stanza.Thought i will share..Its so simple and precise,yet beautiful...

An angel robed in spotless white,
Bent down and kissed the sleeping night.
Night woke to blush; the sprite was gone.
Men saw the blush and called it dawn


Wednesday, June 15

A Page : StUdY LeAvE

Ten minutes past eight.

‘Everyone is studying or what?’ Looked here and there. Sam seemed to be very keen in finishing the topic scheduled for the day. He is like that. Makes a lot’s of plans. He carries chits with him, which will be scribed with time limits with which each portions should be completed. God knows whether he is able to do that. Might not be able to. I can't. And never had. But that doesn't mean he can't. The only thing one needs to execute a plan is commitment. Or is it dedication? I think it's both. He might have both. He’s not even looking up. Great going chap. Good for me. He can definitely clear my doubts once he finishes his topics. But I should have doubts. And for that I should read something, should know what is there in the subject.

‘System simulation’. What a dry chapter. Why should I study a subject like this? And this Geoffrey Gordon is an ass*$*#. Postulates anything without sound explanation and expects all his readers to be Albert Einstein’s. Gosh! I can’t believe Sam reading this book with his eyes full open. He is really great. Or a stupid? Don’t know. Anyways will take a break and come.

Got from my seat. Went to the corridor. Already Himan and kanchu were having nice chat on the corridor. Smiled at them and went to have a glass of water. While taking water peeped through the sides of the water tank cum filter towards those love birds and mused what they might be whispering to each other at this helm of practical exam’s. Maybe he will be clearing her doubts. Then why in this corner. Phew! Such a fool I am. What can a couple in love talk standing in a corner? Should ask Seema, I guess. Had I talked like this to her? Nae! At least not in this manner. The water is very cold. While gulping I wished it were a jar of Cannon 10,000. Nice it would have been.

‘Bhoom’, it sounded as if some planet fell on my back. With pain I swirled around to check out the origin. Bloody fuc#$@. It was Guru. Felt like kicking his ass and pulling out his turban. But ‘decency of a senior’ hooked me. Smiled at him. Passed few pleasantries. While we both were talking and passing that love couple my eyes went on them. “Yaar, mazzha le rahe ho donom”, Guru’s banter echoed in my ears which brought an ugly glee on my face.

Neither of us felt like entering reading hall again, but had to. What a silence it was. And a fetid air. Occupied my seat and looked around. Some third year junior was asking doubt to Sam. I smiled. The same Guy had come to me to ask doubt few days back. I really didn’t want him to feel me as hopeless. So forwarded him to Sam saying he is the best. And poor Sam. Now he has to clear all of that guy’s doubts.

“Abey gaandu padna.” Anand it was. Blob. I was going to swear back, but his wide-open smile comforted me. After-all he sweared with a good intention. I should study now. Opened the book and found a note. ’Don’t do time pass’. I only had written it. Thought it will help me from not getting distracted myself from studies. Looked at my watch. My goodness, its quarter to nine. Somebody had said it true-as we postpone, life speeds by.

Two pages. That’s it. Raised my face from the book. Facing me on the next table is Durgesh. When did he come? Didn’t even come to know. Maybe I was that involved in studying. Huh! Cant believe. “Kab aaya”, my dialogue didn’t reach him. He was going through the index. His viva was two days back. And till now took a break, it seams. Now he is with his next subject, or the next war. Ah! What an analogy I derived. I am happy.

“Kab aaya”, repeated the question. This time a little louder. The guy next to Khamba looked at me annoyed. Sorry man, sorry. I didn’t intend to disturb you. ”Abhi aaya”, he was not even looking at me. Hmm. Seems he is very serious today.

“Tera prac kaisa tha”, I went on.

“Teri jaath ka tanna, padna baithke”. He thundered. I watched him. He put his fingers into his nose exploring something, which I never could trace out what exactly was. He never minds if people are watching that. Everyone used to beef to him regarding the uneasiness with that act, but still he does that. Intentionally or unintentionally.

Durgesh is like that. Now he will be analyzing the syllabus and like Sam making plans how to tackle the subject within the given time. Unlike Sam he does that work in mind only. I decided to keep quiet. That will be good for me. Somebody was making noise discussing in the reading hall. And the security was doing his patrols. I once again dived into the vast syllabus.

Hardly five minutes. Sakti came running. His eyes were searching for me and seeing me came running.”Paanch ticket mila, dus ka show he, aa raha he kya?”

“Kuan kuan hey?”

Main, pavya, nilay, tu …

Who is the fifth guy? We will see. Without a double thought I closed my book. God knows which movie it is and in which hall. It will be ‘Vishal’ only. Sakti asked Anand also. He is little doubtful. Seems he haven’t studied from morning. Will ask Durgesh or Sam. No they wont come. They are too studious to do that. Then who? I looked the whole reading room. There was Mitesh. No. Not him. He will start Power Electronics fundea’s over there also.

Akshat is fiddling with his mobile. I will ask him. ”Dude, coming for a movie.”

“Which one?”

Oh, that even I don’t know. Where is Sakti? I turned around and saw him talking to Nagendra. Is he convincing him?

“Kaun sa movie he bey”, I shouted.

The whole reading hall echoed it. ”Shut up you fuc@$*”, it was Sibu. It had to be him only. No other person will dare to swear like that in reading hall other than me. I raised my hands, apologizing. People are laughing. Sibu is peeping through the gap of his lens, too proud of his achievement. “Saala, padne nahi dega kya?” While I looked at him he smiled and pretended to be very serious with studies. His talks are always filled with swears. I asked him through gestures. Not a single second passed. No is the answer. Showing his empty wallet he continued his studies.

“If its Kal ho na ho, am not coming buddy”, Akshat said.

God, this guy is also too studious. But he finds time for all these. What happened this time? I turned and started walking towards the door.

“Saif is good in that. I saw the matinee show”.

I knew. I knew Akshat could find time for all these. Anyways I will ask Sam. It is not right to disturb and tempt people who are doing their studies. But what I can do? Am like this. A three-hour movie won’t take his distinction away from him. ”I still got to complete this much portion, man”, showing the bundle of Xerox pages. Thank God. I had completed it in the daytime. Madhu had come in the morning to collect those Xerox from Bhakti. I don’t know from where she got that. But she got all the Xeroxes.

I couldn’t wait anymore. Saying bye to Sam I just looked at Durgesh. WHY? Why did I look at him? That look he gave is torturous. ‘You won’t change.’ It was clearly written in his eyes. I tried to hide from his stare. Came out and took the bike and were ready to start, there came Sam running.

“Kuch andar nahi ja raha he yaar, feeling very creepy.”

We laughed. No one said anything. We raced our bikes. The stare of Durgesh. It’s following me I guess. I should be studying this time. After two weeks it’s exam. Never I study during the whole semester and this is the time I should do that. Still going for a movie! But what to do? From morning I am in college only. Nearly 12 hours of study. There is a saturation level. I can’t study anymore. From eight am doing time pass after my dinner. Now nothing is going to be understood how much hard I try. So why not a movie, a break, a boost for my tiredness?

Fifteen minutes it took for us to reach there. Paid the parking bill and reached near the door of the movie hall. Surprise. Mechanical group lead by Poka is already here. Aseeja and group is also here. Oh! what a relief. Entered the movie hall. Three hours of total enjoyment. Wacky wits from Saif really helped the movie.

Came back to reading hall. Its quarter past one. Few people are there still studying. We all sat for studies. Sam’s and Praveen’s eyes were already drooping. They packed their bags and left in a jiffy.

Not feeling sleepy. Started reading once again. Felt like having a cup of tea. But the canteen might have shut at twelve. Anyways I will study.

“Time to close”. A pat on my back came by. Tushar was ready with his bag. Checked the time. It’s two. Almost daily we are the ones to leave the hall last. The only difference is that he studies the whole day and me takes break often. I just ran through what I completed today. Not to the best but definitely not bad. Closed my books, packed my haversack and wore my slippers. Byes to everyone, within five minutes I started off.

Parked my vehicle and opened the door. Sisters had left many lights on. Locked the gate and door. Had a glass of cold milk and brushed teeth. Not feeling that sleepy. I will study for some more time. No, too much of anything is injurious to health, both mentally and physically. Switched on some soothing music. And then without a wait jumped into the bed. The movie was good enough. Worth a watch. And that one hour study was too good. Didn’t know System simulation is so interesting. Now will have a sleep. Have to get up tomorrow and go to college early and study.

Who knows what plans are to be made in the evening?

Tuesday, June 14

Lucky Chap U R....!!

It was 6.30 or 7.00 in the evening. Logged off from my computer desktop and packed my bag. Took the keys and plodded to the parking lot. There stood my bike, deadbeat, waiting for its owner to come. Inserted keys and applied the kicker. But like a slothful adolescent it remained as it is. After trying three-four times, the vehicle got start and, with a gleeful smiles flashing over my face, I headed towards my home.

The day, really, was very hectic. Morning meetings, discussions with stores-in-charge, follow up from the production department, studying problems in the tool room, everything gave a tight schedule. At the end of the day, saturated. Feels like having a hot bath, then a heavy dinner and slipping inside a blanket and catch up a nice sleep. Thoughts went on. Cursing my conditions, getting frustrated thinking about the difficulties in life don’t know how many vehicles I passed. Suddenly a boy standing beside the road asking for a lift retraced me back. Few meters ahead, my consciousness stopped the bike. Looked behind and saw the enthralled eight-ten-year boy coming running towards me.

After jumping on the bike he was trying hard to set his foot on the foot-rest. Once I found he was set, I put the first gear and again headed towards my destination, allowing again my thoughts to roam freely through my mind. But something was blocking its flow. I couldn’t concentrate on my thoughts. It was he, the boy, who had already started blabbering in Hindi in a typical Marathi style. I could feel his tiny hand’s trying to hold my waist, as a precaution. Initially very irritated, within minutes I was drawn to his talks by his charm in that.
He was continuously talking about himself. Where do he stay, about his ailing father, working on contract basis, his mother-who is a servant in some factory, his two elder and one younger brother-two of them working as waiters in hotel, his two sisters, what they do and all. I was not interested in all his family history but the way he was talking hooked me up. Coming from a lower caste, almost-nil-income family, he was briefing his problems. He was expressing his anger against the so-called educated society for exploiting the poor. His vociferous opine regarding the poor-educated-no-job sector in the society really made me disbelief that such ascribed quotes were coming from a kid who had just started his life, who had just started his education.

To my dismay he asked to stop the vehicle. While getting down he thanked me for dropping him. Pointing to the slum on the other side of the road he said, ”my world”. I looked that side. Although I pass through this area daily I haven’t even had a thought to have a look over that bucolic slum area. Few more pleasantries went on. I was thinking how life could be over there. By that time he{forgot even to ask his name} already had made a dart towards his hovel.I again started my vehicle. While riding back the last sentence he said was echoing in my ears, ”Bhaiyya, dekho aap kitna naseebwaala ho!{Brother,see how lucky you are!!}” True it was.